there is a rainbow in his five o’clock shadow

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Sometimes It’s Not Fair

Some days I hate farm life. Not very often but they do happen. It’s not fair. Not fair that my husband can’t be here to celebrate special days; Christmas, Mothers Day, Fathers Day, Valentine’s Day, etc. Not fair that in order to feed the world, we have to be broke half the year. Not fair that at times when I need my husband most, the cows need him more. Not fair that at busy times of the year, he’s never home for family supper or to kiss his kids goodnight. Not fair that I have to make my Mother In Law get groceries with me because I need two carts and my husband is too busy to come. Some days it’s not fair the he has to reheat every meal in the microwave because he was too busy with cows or a machinery fix to come in on time.

Most days I am incredibly grateful to live here and enjoy all the natural beauty of our land. But the sadness and anger creep up sometimes. The odd day I dream of 9-5 jobs and easy things like delivery food. But that’s just not who my husband is and I don’t think that’s who I am anymore. I know I wouldn’t get to see this living in a city.

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Mommy Cheats

It’s hard. Being a Mommy, wife, and a farm helper.

Sometimes it’s easier to skip the bath and put the kids to bed dirty.

Sometimes it’s easier to let my 4 year old nap in my bed with me.

Sometimes it’s easier to let the dishes pile up.

Sometimes it’s easier to give my 2 year old the iPad so I can do a chore in peace.

Sometimes it’s easier to pick up a pizza in town and take it to the field.

Sometimes it’s easier to let my kids run around the backyard like wild animals while I make a decent supper.

Sometimes it’s easier to skip the fighting before bed and just let the toys lay all over the living room.

Sometimes it’s easier to heat up something from a can for lunch.

Sometimes it’s easier to pick clean clothes out of the basket instead of folding and putting away.

Sometimes I need life to be a little easier. I do my best for myself and my family and even though it’ll never please everyone, we get by just fine.

The Past

I took these pictures because I love old buildings like this. The history, the stories that may never be told again. The scenery just touches my soul. I could explore old houses and buildings all day. Unfortunately, I don’t get the chance to do this often. We try to make it happen when my older sister visits from Ottawa. She loves it as much as I do.

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When I see this old grain elevator I always focus on the word Promise. I’m not sure why it’s written on this particular one but I love the thoughts that come when I think about it. The Promise of the future? Of the past? I know there have been promises in my life that have ended being just like this old elevator, abandoned and unkept.

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Do you have a fascination with old buildings? History? What do you think when you see pictures like these?

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I Remember Petey

These memories of mine come from about 6 or so years ago. I don’t think my husband and I were married yet and we definitely didn’t have any kiddos. Calving has brought me this memory and one new calf in particular.

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He’s a twin that we put on a heifer that lost her own calf. The heifer didn’t have much milk at first so I went out to the barn and bottle fed this guy. Boy, he’s rambunctious!!

Anyways, about 6 years we had a brand new calf that had his leg stepped on by a cow. We threw a towel down on the backseat of the Dodge and raced an hour to the vet. Guess who is the lucky girl that got to sit back there with that sweet baby? Yep, it was me! And on the way I named him Petey.

The veterinarian checked him all out and got a cast put on his leg and then we drove him home. We babied him and watched out to make sure he was healing well. Needless to say, he ended up chasing around the pasture with the other calves by late spring.

Hanging around this new bottle fed calf has me missing Petey. I’m just lucky I get to have these great memories.

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*Both pictures are of my new bottle feeding calf, not Petey.*

A Little Something Homemade

I’m going to do a little giveaway today! This is my first giveaway so nothing too fancy. A set of 4 homemade coasters. I’m not doing a complicated raffle draw. I’ll just ask a question at the end and post in the comments your answer.

Here’s the prize!

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I just whipped these up last night and I’m still learning so they aren’t perfect. But they are made with love!

Here’s the question: Do you use coasters? My answer is no. We have young kids so we don’t keep open drinks in the living room.

Open to Canada and the US. I’m choosing to close the giveaway on February 25th 2013. I’ll email the winner for their address to ship the coasters.

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Good luck!!

Updated: Angela is the winner of the coaster set! Thanks everyone for playing along and I hope to do this again.

Easy Breathing Days Ahead

A couple days ago my husband texted me to say the market had hit our contracted durum price. Hooray!! He told me he’d be hauling to the terminal this weekend on his days off from oilfield hauling. A relief on the old bank account.

Today he texted me to say the market had hit our contracted canola price. Double Hooray!! He will also haul all of this crop to the terminal.

Later on today he texted me to tell me a semi will be coming tomorrow to load out 2011 organic flax which will be hauled to the States. Sold all of it so we will no longer have any organic crops on our farm. I’m glad we found a decent buyer who have us a worthwhile price for this crop.

Spring is our big payment paying time so this income coming in will be a huge relief. And with the price of canola going up, the price of fertilizer will also rise. So now is the time to buy our fertilizer for this seeding year.

I’ve had many smiles today with all these good news texts from Brad. I hope the good news keeps coming and we can sustain the farm until a hopefully good harvest in the Fall.

Rice Bags

I recently got a sewing machine and have been practicing with different stitches on scrap fabric. I really want to make quilts and rag quilts but have started with a simpler project.

I have been making heating and cooling rice bags. Hand sized ones to quickly heat in the microwave and bigger ones for your back or neck. They can be popped in the freezer on a hot summer’s day too.

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My younger sister is the first to want one so I hope she likes hers. If I get good feedback, maybe I’ll sell some at local craft shows.

I’m proud of myself for finding a new hobby that helps me pass the time and makes me feel good for accomplishing something. The winters are long and boring for me around here so I’m glad to have something to keep me busier.

My Damn Oven Broke and Other Random Poopyness

I’m not feeling Christmas this year. I mean I was at the beginning of the month but it’s slowly dissipated. Because this thing happened. And this thing. And this thing. And some of it not even to me or my immediate family but why does bad stuff happen to good people?! I’m sad for others having hard times right now. And the fact we haven’t visited anyone yet. And we have no Christmas baking.

My extended family is far away or sick. And I will not have the flu on Christmas Eve again like I did in 2010. I puked on my son’s head that night. Total accident. But my husband still brings it up on random occasions. And my husband’s parents are gone for Christmas. Nothing like hearing a 3YO constantly ask to go see his grandma and poppa for a week straight.

My bottom oven element went the week before last. Husband attempted to fix it when all of sudden a loud POP was heard in that general direction. The fixing made it worse so now even when these damn elements show up in the mail we still won’t have an oven.

What is Christmas without yummy homemade treats??? And cookies for Santa? Santa might get potato chips and pop at this house. Maybe we’ll start a new tradition.

Oh and did I mention my husband is working all through Christmas week? Up and gone at 5am and home anywhere from 4pm-10pm. Should be fun explaining to a 3YO that yes, Santa filled our stockings and brought presents but NO touching til Daddy gets home. Whenever that may be.

I really am grateful that I have my kids with me (mess making, screaming people they are). And I can’t wait to see their faces as they open their presents (whenever that actually is).

P.S. It’s a blizzard here now. And roads are closed. Travel not recommended. But I have to go to town in the morning because we have no Christmas booze.

P.S. Christmas is my birthday. So I’m spending that like any other day too. Hopefully I can find a babysitter next weekend and go have a good time in a pretty dress and shoes.

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